Monday, August 10, 2015

If Trump were President

I realize some Republicans are in a perpetual state of anger (thank you, Fox News), and I realize Trump has tapped into that anger. But can you seriously imagine him as president, working with our allies? I think it would go something like this:

Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper: We need to talk about Putin and the Russian situation.

Trump: Just nuke the bastard. Boom, done. You're welcome, Canada.

French President Francois Hollande: Don't you think we should try diplomacy first?

Trump: Of course the French would suggest diplomacy. Diplomacy is for cowards and LOSERS!

English Prime Minister David Cameron: You can't just ignore the Geneva Conventions and international law.

Trump: Up yours, King George! I'm an American, and Americans don't answer to foreigners. We didn't in 1776, and we won't now.

German Chancellor Angela Merkel: We can't just "nuke" them. Think of all the civilian casualties.

Trump: Spare me your bleeding heart and your bleeding whatever.

Merkel: Excuse me?!?

Trump: I don't have time for political correctness. I have some bombs to drop. *leaves*

Harper: ...We need to talk about Trump and the American situation.

Hollande: Just nuke the bastard.

Cameron: Boom.

Merkel: Done.

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